Life For Rent

Ooo just had a good jet massage in the jacuzzi at St Greg Spa. However being outdoors, the water’s kinda cold. Too cold.

That word very much depicts the whole place too. Too professional and ‘cold’ where everyone goes there and does their own thing. Yikes. It is so not my kind…But its free admission for me, so oh well. Whenever I have a little time to spare.

Did I mention I am in a crazed mood for ‘pink’? Ever since the ‘Pink R Us’ (as I like to call it) date with Shane weeks back I have been on a frenzy. I bought a pair of polo tees from Giordano yesterday. They had 3 shades of pink, I chose the darkest pink while the sales girl and my colleague said the mid pink is better on me. Urgh. I suck at colors don’t I? So bought a pink and a white, for 35. It is dry fit, and it feels nice and comfy..:)

I also hung a sign behind my car. It says “I am fat. And you are ugly. But I can diet.”

Nuff said…

I just read a review bout Flightplan from the ST life section. It appears the writer doesn’t hold the movie to high regard, ending with a “ought to be grounded” remark. I am still gonna catch it though, and see how it goes.

I think I reserved Duece and Flightplan for bobee and jeff respectively. Or is it the other way round?

You know, I was approached by this lady yesterday at Raffles Place. I shant say which nationality she apparently belongs to, other than she is of Chinese origin. She came by and went yada yada about not having enough money and her father will be remitting money over the next day and was wondering if I could loan her some meantime. I knew what she was up to, despite taking down my number and name. I tossed her 10 bucks as a ‘donation’. She couldn’t have picked a better target cause I am known for finding difficulty in saying no. Especially to people who peddle their wares at hawker centres and all. I am such a sucker. But anyway, she picked the wrong day though. She asked for more, 30 or 40 bucks, to stay at a cheap motel and all. I told her to get the staff there to call me and I will arrange her accomodation. No way am I gonna part with more money, and I was very sure she was bullshitting. She was quite persistent, that she didn’t want to trouble me further but I insisted she get the staff to call me, and I will arrange everything. She need not worry. She gave up eventually.

I did not anticipate her call and true enough it never came.

Don’t these people ever learn? Take away that yes they may be down and out, I already parted with 10 bucks. What else she wants? 40? Give an inch and she takes a yard? What does she take me for? Some stupid fella? I don’t want to condem the entire population of them for I believe it is rather isolated, just these one or two lost black sheeps. But to get me to part with my money, one has to know that I can’t stand being lied upon. You lie to me, and I know it, I may decide not to part with a cent at all. No pity or sympathy given.

For 25 years I found it hard to reject or say no to people. Yesterday, I have grown. In fact I notice a lot of difference in the past 1 year. I dared to stand on my own two feet and if I had to use my intimidating size, I would. I aint as sympathetic, forgiving, or timid as I used to. I am nice, but don’t take my kindness as a weakness and climb on top of my head and shit there.

I wanted to scream it all at her, but decided not to and just get on my way as I was rushing to meet my project group mates.

Price of sympathy? 10 bucks.

Telling someone off for their load of crap? Priceless.

By the way I found the perfect place to meet up for discussions and stuff. Have you been to the new national library?

It is a little embarrassing, but today was my first time there. Met up with my project group mates. Couldn’t find a place in the entire building (its huge!) where we can discuss stuff but found Hans instead. A pretty neat place. Quiet, not crowded at all, and you can do what you want. Literally.

But please do not try their sandwiches and food. Hot food offered are pasta etc, they do NOT offer the usual local dishes. I wouldn’t wanna order those after seeing what my project mate had to eat..

I took a mango smoothie though. Not too bad. I guess drinks are usually safer.

Don’t ask me bout weekends, but the above is all true for a week night. At least, on a Tuesday.

Now pls don’t start flocking there and ruin my new ‘hang out’! Thank you.

Just kidding.

The new library’s cool. It’s smack in between Bugis and City Hall MRT stations. Drop off at Bugis station and follow the signs to the national library. It’s a breeze.

Now how come I have never noticed that building being constructed…hmm

?

Thank you lobby for the show and date!

The Skeleton Key, as I had expected, has an interesting story line. You think you know what will happen next, and you think you can predict the outcome. But I can personally guarentee, if you haven’t watched it/heard the story from someone/read something or anything to do with the movie, you will sit through the story till the end and go ???????? at the twist right at the end of the story. And then, everything makes sense. And you go ahhhhhh….

It is rated as a horror, but it is not a whole lotta horror, but a thriller that keeps you at the edge of the seat throughout the entire duration. One thing for sure, don’t open things one shouldn’t open. Curiosity killed the cat. In this one, it killed more than just a cat. Without revealing too much, I rate this a very high A-. Pay 9.50 for this? I would. And so did I, with no regrets.

Got a reminder through email from Edwin bout this place. It has been a while since I last posted aint it? Actually it hasn’t been long, but I have been very caught up with work and school. Among other issues.

I went to Changi Airport T2 to attend to some issues with one of my OSIM outlets. The guy I went with, commented how much he hates going to the airport to work. Airport is like ,vacation time man. Not to work!

I so agree. I spoke about how much emotions I gather from the airport whenever I am there. Today however, that emotion didn’t seem to come. I last travelled in Aug last year with my dear then. It has been a while and I am really looking forward to a break. I feel drained, from head to toe. Someone’s lucky enough to be going on a lil break to a neighbouring country. I aint so lucky. But I shant compare, or comment. In this little country we call Singapore, we are bred and cultured to be impatient (drivers), rude (I pay so I deserve the service) and outsourced to the devil (sell one’s soul to one’s employer).

You know, these days I think everyone owns a piece of me, except myself. My boss, my work, everything owns me, but myself. How crazy is that. I have lost humanity, personality, and sensitivity. I am numb, robotic, and moodless with nothing in the near future for me to look forward to. At least for now. What’s next? My UK trip, in May next year, and that’s like eons away…

I miss Orion, I wanna look at it and talk to it. Silently. Wireless data transmission to it. It hears my soul. It hears my screams. Can it bring light to the dark paths that I thread on?

Anyone wanna go star gazing with me? Before the clouds come in.

Does anyone know of anything that runs faster than the speed of light? Not very likely. Scientifically though it is possible to surpass the speed of light theoretically, it cannot be done in this world.

But I have found something that runs faster than light.

Hmm, but you know what. I’m not gonna say it out here. It is something that will reside in my heart. The numbers 1103 hold special significance. The numbers 101005 will also carry some significance.

The thing is. I am a woofie. I am not a jigsaw piece. And I never will be your jigsaw piece. I miss you. And I love you. Very very much still, trust me. I still cry each time I think of us. But I have to hold back, and set you free. Like a butterfly, you belong to the skies. Not the kennel. You have always been a butterfree, but never a sillyporean one. I was foolish to think you were still a wormie. You have since evolved to something that can fly. I can only look up from where I am on the ground, and wish you well as you flutter away.

I never regretted knowing you. I don’t regret the bad things that have happened. I will treausre the many happy moments we once shared. The things we shared…But the time that we must part will come sooner or later. The next time we meet, and if we do meet, we may be very different people. We may look different. But I will always remember you as someone I loved fondly. The many waves we sailed over. The many hurdles we jumped over. And the one pit, we both feel into. The imfamous ditch hole. Like a black hole, it sucks everything from you. Not light, not a single atom escapes its lethal force.Where is this hole? This hole exists in everyone’s hearts. Some may have the fortune of not being able to find it yet. Or have it opened. Cuz once its open, it can never be closed. Like pandora’s box. Only this one is far worse.

The tears we used to cry for one another. The hugs we used to share. The kisses we used to exchange. The tickles you used to receive. Each and every entity, revovled around us. They represented us. Orion is here, but it sits above an empty land. 1st Jan saw the union of two of us. The next 1st Jan will instead see the union of my bmt buddy and his fiance. It is almost like, fate had it all figured out and planned.

He’ll probably put you onto a plane and send you far far away, for many many years to come. It’ll all make sense one day, I am sure.

How do you heal a broken heart? I don’t know. But one thing I do know. Is how I felt towards you never changed, but got better and better with each day. A love that grew with the plants surrounding us.

I enjoy my favourite serial “My date with a vampire 2″ because of its love theme. That love conquers even the savage beasts (vampires, in this show)

But even love, just, isn’t enough.

We found the love for each other. Yet, after all these years, we never found one another.. I have failed, miserably on my part. It is a defeat, I am willing to admit.

For your sake and mine, let me be the quitter. Throw in the towel. Tap. I have nothing left. And I don’t have anything to fight for. And thus, I concede defeat.

Call me a loser. Call me anything you want. End of the day, I just hope you’ll remember I once existed, and that I am woofie. The ditchdog.

There are two basic types of expectations. Okay I shall not use that word.

Here are the 2 GOOD TO HAVEs :

1. A partner who comes into your life and complements everything. Fitting in like a perfect jigsaw puzzle. ie. You go into his world.

2 A partner who brings his world to you instead. ie, you sit on top so high, everyone has to take a lift to get up to that level.

Which are you?

The wait is over! I got my new phone, at a hefty price (at least to me) but it came with quite a fair bit of freebies anyway. It is the D500 (or something like that) from Samsung. Everyone said it looks good on me and the 530 is just too girly, when I saw it.

The D500 has everything I want in a phone too. I hope it doesn’t screw up on me though. I kinda like it a whole lot and yeh I feel a tad bit happier. I buy on impulse, when I am upset usually. Usually I don’t buy things for myself. When I am upset however I go and get stuff for myself and worry hout the bills later. But I can handle it I reckon. Cool phone.

I saw 2 guys holding hands over the weekend. Twice. Different couples at different places. I thought it was kinda cool. Walking down the aisle literally without giving a hoot to what people around think. One pair was more discreet, the other was swinging their hands up and down as I turned back to look. hah hah. Way to go guys. I don’t know what the others say or think but I say, way to go. You guys have done something I haven’t been able to do. Yet.

Chad’s calling…gotta go for now!

I know it is the hurricane season, but is this year’s hurricanes more severe? Look at the toll from Katrina, and then Rita which wasn’t so bad. Now Stan has basically single handedly burried towns and killed many people. I don’t recall hearing of such severe storms in the past few years. But I may be wrong..but 2005 appears to be a year of natural disasters.

A lot of people’s lifes appear to be a disaster too anyway.

I was bored, moodless, and groggy from work and illness. Had loads of work to do still but decided perhaps I needed the night out. And a night out I did get with Shane. We caught Into The Blue. It centres around a group of divers who dive and find hidden treasure underneath the seabed. They say there’s 6 billion bucks worth of treasure waiting to be found out there in the oceans. These guys got more than they bargained for. They found a plane that crashed, with a cargo of cocaine. One decides he doesn’t wanna have anything to do with it, while the other is a tad greedy. He screwed up from the beginning to the end. From selling the cargo to the market, and through some ‘luck’, to the cargo’s rightful owner. You can imagine the consequences. The whole episode cost the life of his side kick, whom he didn’t really care cause he ‘knew her for 5 days only’. Makes one wonder how you can trust someone of this sorta attitude yeh?

Most of the action comes towards the end of the show, and I would say it wasn’t too bad at all. I would pay 9.50 since I had the bonus of great company.

After the show I had a crazy thought and I told him bout it. I said, what if we went to town, and caught another show, like, now!

And town we did go to. Cineleisure didn’t have anything exciting at all. So we walked down towards Plaza Singapura, not much luck there either, BUT he pointed out something which till now, I thought it was way kewl! There was a group in front of us, and two guys were holding hands! I was posting to a thread started by someone in a public forum bout spotting 2 guys holding hands, and I wonder if it is the same couple really. As we walked past them, I heard one say in mandarin, talking to a friend of his “you aint used to seeing guys hold hands?”.

I later saw them at GV on the 7th floor again. Still holding hands. So cool!!! I just wonder if one day I’d do that as well. Seriously maybe someone will come into my life and make me do that. But I was telling Shane, you know people say Singaporeans are conservative but caucasians are open minded. That’s utter rubbish. Here, the most is you’ll hear people go ‘tsk tsk” shaking their heads at the scene. In other countries, you can get shot, point blank, by homophobics presumbly. And is being conservative a bad thing? Imagine when you hit 18, or 21, of which the law states that officially your parents do not have to support you financially anymore. You can be kicked out of the house and there is nothing you can do about it. That’s happening in other countries. People learn to be independent at a young age. Are we prepared for that? Our parents treat us as kids still, even after we are married. Seriously, we will always be their babies.

My thought is, be happy at where you are. In a world where there is no one paradise, learn to appreciate the advantages of being a citizen of a country. I am happy, to reside in Singapore, despite the work culture, the imaptient drivers (including myself) and what not. But I reckon I won’t get shot that easily here. And I can walk in the streets knowing that I will probably be safe at the end of the day still.

Thank you Shane for the great night. We wore pink t shirts somehow too! If you guys wanna see how he looks like, maybe I will put it up with his permission. Just maybe.

Alright I have to get back to work before I get some shut eye…grrr..Sorry Chad for standing you up from the conversation I promised. I reckon you fell asleep already…:(

See ya later I suppose. I need to get some hamster food too..and I look forward in sampling some sushi from Deon..:P

I’m a happier man today. Great company makes up for everything. At least to me. If you are a friend that I call a friend, I would like to thank you for your friendship. And I shall strive to try and preserve that for a long time to come.